Archive for October, 2009

 

 

Somebody Told a Lie

 

MIAMI, FL  -  Somebody told a lie somewhere. 

They sent Leo a brochure telling him that America was the land of the free, and very prosperous.

The streets are paved with gold!

They sent him posters of Florida, and invited him to come on down.

Leo believed them, packed his things and moved to Florida…just like they asked.

Within two weeks they arrested Leo for vagrancy and “obstructing justice.”

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They arrested Leo’s dog

What justice are they talking about?   

How did Leo obstruct it?  

Leo’s only crime was to believe the lies from El Norte.

 

Puerto Rican Guy

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A Society Gone Mad

 

CAGUAS, PR  -  Last week, Leo Machuchal was falsely accused of robbing three liquor stores and raping twelve school teachers in Caguas, Puerto Rico. 

To combat this conspiracy, Leo took to the streets and gave away everything he owned.      

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Leo was so generous that, in three days, he went completely broke and homeless. 

So what happened? 

The police arrested Leo, his family, and even his dog, for loitering without a license.

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They arrested Leo’s dog

When a man gets arrested for being generous to others, it’s time to re-think our social model.   

 

Puerto Rican Guy

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No Rest For Leo

 

LOS ANGELES, CA -  Leo Machuchal has checked himself into the Malibu Alcohol and Rehabilitation Center (MARC), for a truly horrific addiction. 

It appears that women (particularly Hollywood starlets) have heard of his Qi Jong sexual technique, and are stalking him through the streets of Los Angeles. 

Leo cannot walk his dog or do his laundry, without being attacked by young over-sexed women.

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We hope that Leo can find a cure for this terrible affliction. 

Please do not contact the editors of Puerto Rican Guy to ask for the whereabouts of Leo. 

He is exhausted.

 

Puerto Rican Guy

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Halloween Leo

 

CAGUAS, PR  -  According to Puerto Rican police, serious crimes are being committed in the town of Caguas, Puerto Rico. 

A gentleman who claims to be Leo Machuchal has robbed three liquor stores and raped twelve school teachers. 

His picture is up in every bank and post office in Puerto Rico.

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The Caguas monster who rapes school teachers

If you have seen this man, please report him to the Puerto Rican Guy immediately.

 

Puerto Rican Guy

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Remy Garcia Leo

 

MANAGUA, NICARAGUA  -  Leo Machuchal has a famous cousin in Nicaragua.

His name is Remy Garcia Leo, the most feared Kung Fu Master in Latin America. 

On August 27, 2009 Remy Garcia Leo knocked out Kimbo Slice in a basement match…in 28 seconds flat.

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Remy Garcia Leo

Last week Remy accepted a wrestling challenge with a Florida alligator, that did not work out as well.

 The alligator knew only one martial arts move but it was very effective.

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The alligator had only one move

We will keep you informed of the martial arts career of Remy Garcia Lee. 

He is already a legend in Florida, and a hero to all Latinos.

 

Puerto Rican Guy

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