Posts Tagged “Pedro Paramo”

 

El Pelo de Nico

 

MIAMI, FL  – A clue has finally turned up in the manhunt for El Nico, who has robbed eleven banks in three weeks in the Palm Beach area of Miami, Florida.

According to Pedro Paramo, Chief of Detectives for Miami Dade County, “the man loves only two things. Money and his hair.”

Sources have told Paramo that El Nico gets his hair done, on the morning of every robbery. “We interviewed every beautician in Palm Beach,” said Paramo, “and we have a few leads.”

El Nico and his hair

Miami Dade police refused to release any further information.

Puerto Rican Guy

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Puerto Rican Guy Solves Every

 

State and Federal Deficit in the

 

U.S.

 

NEW YORK CITY, NY  -  Leo Machuchal has saved the U.S. economy. 

With his new economic model, the Pedro Paramo Backward Bending Consumption Curve, he has eliminated our federal debt and plugged the deficit of every state and municipality in America.

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The Pedro Paramo backward bending consumption curve

So profound is Leo’s solution, that 12 states have already placed him on the ballot for 2010.

 That’s right…as of this moment, and by popular demand, Leo Machuchal is running for governor in 12 different states.

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Leo loves everybody

Vote for Leo. 

 

Puerto Rican Guy

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Puerto Rican Guy

 

Arrested in San Juan

 

The Puerto Rican guy was arrested again this weekend.  

On Friday October 31 he incited a riot in San Juan, by declaring the independence of Puerto Rico “effective immediately.”

Puerto Ricans celebrate their independence

According to the New York Post, the Puerto Rican “poses a terrorist threat greater than Barack Obama.”

The charge is vehemently denied by King Papo, head of the Almighty Latin King and Queen Nation

Papo smells a rat

“Me and Leo was chasin’ shorties that night, said King Papo. “They arrested him in New York. Esa vaina in San Juan was made up by Rupert Murdoch!”  

Honeymooning in Denmark with his fourth wife, Mr. Murdoch was unavailable for comment.   

According to social historian Perez Hilton, “Rupert is too old for that woman. He’s too old for any woman.”

Perez smells a rat

A writ of habeus corpus was filed by Harvard Law Professor Pedro Paramo, arguing that “something is rotten in Denmark…but it’s under your fridge!”

Pedro smells a rat

The Puerto Rican will be released on Monday November 3, the day before the U.S. presidential election.
 
The electoral effect of Murdoch’s honeymoon particularly in Ohio, Virginia and Palm Beach remains to be seen.

Rupert avenges his pre-nup

 

Puerto Rican Guy.

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