Posts Tagged “reason”

 

 Leo on the Campaign Trail

 

WASHINGTON HEIGHTS, NYC  – Leo Machuchal is back on the campaign trail in Washington Heights.

He can be seen everywhere in his little bus, yelling “vote for Leo!”

But Leo respects our privacy, and hates to intrude on it. For this reason his first bill will be the requirement of individual cell phone booths for everyone who uses a cell phone.

Leo talks on the subway

The voters don’t know what to make of it. 

But they sure love talking.

Puerto Rican Guy

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Political Petitions in Washington Heights

 

WASHINGTON HEIGHTS, NYC  –  After one day of circulating their petitions, the political campaigns have turned ugly in Washington Heights.

Former City Councilman Guillermo Linares has recruited a group of zombies to collect his petition signatures, and they are causing property damage in the Marble Hill Houses.

Linares worker asks a Democrat for a signature

According to Leo Machuchal, Section 8 of the Voting Rights Act “specifically prohibits the hiring of zombies north of 96th street.” 

For this reason, Machuchal is demanding federal marshals to monitor all election activity in upper Manhattan. 

“I can handle it when dead people vote,” said Machuchal. 

“But here in Washington Heights we kill them three, four or five times…and they still vote.”

Puerto Rican Guy

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Two Fops in Fajardo

 

FAJARDO, PR – The law firm of Machuchal & Garcia is widely hated throughout all of Puerto Rico.

The reason is very simple – they win every case they take on, and make more money than Governor Anibal Acevedo-Vila (a well-known crook).

In all fairness, Leo Machuchal and Remy Garcia have developed a strange courtroom demeanor.

They dress like British barristers, complete with silk underwear and powdered wigs.  For this reason, the San Juan Star has accused them of legal foppery.

Garcia and Machuchal, accused of foppery

The two lawyers are inseparable, which raises a series of other questions.

What is the relationship of these two men?  Why do they wear wigs?  Why does Leo Machuchal look suspiciously like Charles Laughton?

Leo presents the no homo defense

The entire island of Puerto Rico is demanding answers.  

Meanwhile Garcia and Machuchal have become multi-millionaires, and will soon star in a TV reality show. 

Puerto Rican Guy

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Leo’s Soccer Field

 

CAGUAS, PR – Leo has built a strange soccer field in Puerto Rico. 

For some reason he built it around a tree. 

A few players have run into the tree, and killed themselves.

This is not funny.  Leo should get that tree out of there.

Puerto Rican Guy

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Leo Nascimento Machuchal

 

CAGUAS, PR – Puerto Rico is in the 2010 World Cup Soccer Championship. 

This is the first time ever, that Puerto Rico has qualified for the World Cup. 

According to Remy Garcia, President of FIFA International Soccer, “there is only one reason that Puerto Rico is in the World Cup…that reason is Leo Machuchal.” 

Leo has perfected the flying overhead bicycle suicide kick.

Every player who tries this kick, has broken their back or cracked several ribs. 

Leo performs three of them per game.         

Congratulations to Leo Nascimento Machuchal…the greatest soccer player on the planet.

Puerto Rican Guy

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